Can Viagra and Cialis Help with Performance Anxiety? A Case Study, Advice and Alternatives.
I get this question a lot in blog comments and emails. My own opinions on this are mixed. People always want a magic bullet or an easy fix — which is why Viagra and Cialis are such huge cash cows. But often the guys emailing me have porn problems (porn-induced ED, addiction, etc.), so giving up porn (“rebooting”) is a necessary and important part of the solution.
Oftentimes when a guy experiences an ED episode with a woman – even if it’s the first time in his life — he loses confidence and gets caught in a cycle of anxiety and poor performance. I recognize that there are some circumstances where taking Viagra or Cialis can help you overcome this performance anxiety.
This is a controversial topic in the reboot community. Some men recovering from porn induced ED report that it is helpful to use small doses of Viagra or Cialis to reduce anxiety when starting to be sexual again with a real partner. Other guys say it’s a cop-out and doesn’t address the real issues behind the problem, such as porn-use and learning how to deal with stress and anxiety. We’ll look at both of these POVs (see what I did there?) below, with a real case study.
Jay’s Case Study.
The following is a guest post from a guy we’ll call Jay (not his real name), who emailed me about his experience taking Cialis and Viagra to help with his performance anxiety. He covers a lot of important topics that are helpful to know if you decide to go this route.
I was 21 and single. I had read The Game and was spending a lot of time with my buddies at the bar practicing ridiculous conversation “openers”. And to my surprise sometimes they worked. Looking back, I think it was the confidence that I had in the memorized stories that made me attractive. (I should say that nowadays I don’t believe in memorizing lines or lying to create interest from women, but I am grateful to the ‘pickup’ community for the introduction it gave me to self-development.)
I had a handful of one-night stands that year, usually with women who were a little older and had their own apartments (I was living at home while going to Uni). I was often a bit drunk those nights, and it was a pretty great time in my life. There were even a few girls who wanted to see me again.
Anyway, one night I went home with an older woman who pretty much said “let’s go to my place” before I was even finished my first drink. She seemed to me really experienced and like it was just ‘business’ to her. Basically, she wanted to have sex, and I happened to be the guy that night. She was really attractive, but I think the way that she acted really intimidated me. Neither of us were drunk and by the time we were in her bedroom taking off our clothes I was super nervous.
Little Blue Pills.
When I consulted my doctor about my sexual anxiety problems, he recommended I take small doses of Viagra and slowly wean myself off of the drugs over time.
After a few weeks of taking small doses of Viagra each time I was going to have sex, I got my “mojo” back. I cut down on the doses until I wasn’t using any at all. In my case, the Viagra helped me relax and focus on being in the moment and enjoying sex, rather than worrying about being able to get an erection.
Becoming Dependent.
After the first few weeks of taking Viagra and getting back my confidence, I went through a while – maybe six months where I didn’t touch the pills. I didn’t need them – I had my confidence back and life was good again.
But then maybe six months later, I had an experience where I couldn’t get it up with a girl I was starting to get serious with, and since then I became really nervous every time I tried to have sex. The anxiety was back.
At this point, I had used all except for half a pill and I didn’t want to go back to my doctor to get more pills. For one, they were damn expensive. And also, I was kind of ashamed to tell him that I needed more.
Anyway, I researched online and I found a site that would ship them to my house in a nondescript package. Those little orange pills ain’t cheap, especially if you’re getting the prescribed, brand name version. I ended up buying generic Cialis (tadalafil), online.
After that, for maybe 6 months I would take a small piece of a pill (maybe 3-5mg of a 20mg Cialis pill) nearly every time I had sex because it made me feel less anxious. Eventually, I weaned myself off the pills, but it was more difficult because I’d been using them so long.
I think the most important thing to keep in mind if you do start taking Viagra or Cialis, is to really limit yourself to a short time period, otherwise you’ll start to feel like you need it to perform. Your brain will start to play tricks on you. Like, you might notice that your erections without it are not as strong. My advice is: avoid this trap and keep to just a few small doses and end it there.
Advice: Cialis for the Win.
First thing is I would recommend Cialis over Viagra. They’re both very effective in my experience, but in terms of cost effectiveness: one 20mg Cialis pill is $ XX, and you can break that into roughly 4 doses that last for about 2 full days (longer for some guys). A 50mg Viagra pill can also be broken into smaller pieces to save money, but the effects are much more short-lived (4 hours). If you’re spending a long weekend with your girl, you could take one dose of Cialis, compared to 4 or 5 doses of Viagra (depending on how active you are of course! ?
Side effects.
There are also the side effects to take into account. With Cialis, some people get flushed, headaches, or a stuffy nose. For me it was stomach issues. This probably doesn’t happen to everyone, but I would get diarrhea two or three days after I take the pill. I’ve read that it’s a fairly common result from tadalafil (the active compound in the drug).
Conclusion: Both Pros and Cons.
I’ve tried my best to give an objective view of my experience using ED drugs for my performance anxiety. All in all, I am very grateful that I overcame the anxiety and I know it was partly helped by taking the pills. On the other hand, I think that you need to also look at why you have anxiety, and try to fix the causes – which is much more difficult.
I’ll try to answer questions in the comments below if anyone has any.
Brian here again.
Very enlightening guest post!
My biggest problem with recommending Viagra or Cialis is that like many medicines, they focus on the symptom rather than address the root cause:
Where does your anxiety come from? Why are you having problems with getting erections? These are difficult, but important questions, but asking them can set you on the path to change your life for the better.
Further reading.
I’ve written a lot about different techniques I used to overcome my own performance anxiety, which you can about here and here.
I’ve also written extensively about how excessive porn-use is at the root of many guys’ ED problems. If you think you might have porn-induced ED, you can start here.
Do you have experience using Viagra or Cialis to overcome performance anxiety? Leave a comment below!
(Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, nor do I play one on the Internet. Please consult your doctor before taking any sort of medication.)
Related Posts.
Brian overcame a long-standing addiction to Internet porn and fully recovered from serious porn-induced erectile dysfunction and performance anxiety. For more about Brian, see my story.
Ill just State What I went through which Is Different. I Never even dated a Woman till I was 30 yrs of Age- Prior to that It was Work & Sports. Married in 1993- Then 24 Yrs old. Only had light problem of Ejaculating about 2+ Minutes after being inside Her. Sometimes it was 1+ Minutes. then in 1997 Involved iin Accident- Not My Fault- He Owned up to His Fault 3 Yrs Later. I had 80% Brain Damage & 1 Leg Below Knee Amputated- a Truck came Round Blind Corner Over Double Lines & Hit Me. Im One of Top 1% Who Completely recover from Brsin Damage. Also Walk Well Unaided with Prosthetic Leg. BUT After Leaving Hospital Doctors Had Me on Anti-Depressant Tablets & 1998-2008 I Could Not Get Errection Or Cumm. I was Taken Off Them in 2008 & Without Me doing Anything the Next Morning after 4 Hour of Usual Time I Took the Pills I Got anErrection, Now I Think Im Better Then Before Marriage But I Want To Be Sure Becs=ause Im in Contact With a Lovely Lady & Want All To be Ok. NB- I Spoke to Top Medical people Who Say Some( Noy All) Anti-depressant tablets Cause Men to Not get Errections Etc.Hopefully All will Be OK In The Future with Your Good Assistance.
Thanks for sharing your story. I’m sorry to hear about your accident but glad that you were able to recover.
It’s true that some anti-depressants have the unfortunate side-effect of inhibiting erections. I’m not a doctor, so make sure you talk to your doctor about any possible contraindications between medications you’re taking and Cialis or Viagra.
I Stated the Wrong AGE, Because in 1993 when I Married I was 34 Not 24.
“We’ll look at both of these POVs (see what I did there?) below, with a real case study.”
I laughed so much at this! LOL.
Just discovered this “reboot” thing, I suffer (big time) from performance anxiety and actually had no idea this was the problem. Think I need to try this, I grew up running porn sites (the old TGP type) from about the age of 12, (sad childhood watching porn and started building websites) I’ve been suffering a long time. Everything I’ve heard about this condition in one night I have related to myself.
Glad you liked the article.
That’s quite the story you have, making porn websites from age 12! But, I’m sure that with enough time, all wounds can heal.
Best of luck with your reboot.
I am 22 years old and i have experienced erectile dysfunction twice in my life. I had a girlfriend in high school who i lost my virginity to. We had a great sex life and i never once expierenced ED with her and we had sex literally hundreds of times. At the beginning we used condoms for the first year but after that the next 5 years it was strictly unprotected. We started dating when i was in 8th grade. First had sex summer going into freshman year (early I know). We broke up summer going into junior year, and the week after i hooked up with a girl. We went to have sex but i could not get hard. It was in a car and t was raining really hard from what i remember but more than anything i think i was nervous. But after that me and my ex got back together and the sex was great again. I feel as though i never had a problem with her because i was relaxed and i knew how it was going to go each time because usually the sex was similar each time. Fast forward to my sophomore year in college we are now broken up. Year going on 2 years that we have been broken up we have had sex 10 to 20 times but never got back together and i had an erection every time. I might also add that i have been addicted to porn since i was 13 and have watched it pretty much every day every other day since then. It would make me last longer with my ex but i would always get a boner. My ex has a new boyfriend now and i wanted to get over her, so i ventured out. I met a girl and soon enough she wanted to come to my house so we could have sex. This is is the second time i experienced ED. I knew in the back of my head that the time i tried having sex with someone other than my ex it didn’t work out. she came over, we talked, watched a movie and towards the end we started getting into it. Making out, she went to give me oral sex and i just couldn’t get hard. I tried and tried and couldn’t get hard. eventually i got half hard and ejaculated on her and it was over. really embarrassing. What can i do? I watch porn because i am a very horny guy and I’m myself and have no problem getting hard. i jerk off without porn as well off fantasy usually thinking about my ex and it works every time. i hate this. I’m thinking about claims but i know that its because of my anxiety and that might not help. please give me some advice i would really appreciate it. thank you.
Can you talk a bit more about how you phased out the ED pills? I have been using them to pass this anxiety, I now have a girlfriend and I am more anxious that I won’t perform without them.
For my Cialis Reviews I would agree 100% that it can decrease performance anxiety. If you’ve got cialis in your system you’ve got much less to worry about.
that boners going up lol.
How much dose did you take?
I had terrible performance anxiety so i went on to a cycle of aurogra tablets for about a month. After I got in to the routine of having intercourse I stopped taking them and now I no longer need them. Great enhancements!
Good article! A lot of useful information. Thank!
what website did you use to get your cialis? I am a young guy going through a very similar situation but I don’t know which websites to trust.
Hi, recently i encountered ed issue. I like this girl very much. There was a time we first intimacy, and i can get erected and after keeping trying, finally it get hard,but it cum out after a few thrust. I’ve been spending everyday in the gym, (cos the girl like musclin guy)and i have not sleep well due to work stress. Is this the cause of ed?
Doctor precribed me viagra and cialis, do i really need to take the pill? Coming week me and my girl going to a party, and i really hope can have a great sex with her.
Please advise on this.
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